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Giuliani Is Broke
Tiger Woods has become the hottest meme template of the year, Rudy Giuliani is down horrendous, Shell extended its job cuts, Harvard stands behind President Gay, container rates hit $10k, Brookfield’s debt was cut to junk by the S&P, and Hyperloop One was shut down.
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Big Pay Day for Southwest Pilots
Wells Fargo employees voted in favor of unionizing, Citi is exiting distressed debt trading, Fed’s Harker says rates should move down but not immediately, Milei is privatizing Argentinian companies, US 30-year mortgage rates hit lowest level since June, and Southwest pilots are looking at a 50% pay bump.
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Fee-ling Broke: The Price of Gas
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Red Sea Shipping Risks
A Colorado court disqualified Trump from its 2024 ballot, Google owes $700M in a Play store settlement, Citi is facing a #MeToo claim, the IRS may be forgiving $1B in taxpayer penalties, Brazil’s credit rating was raised by the S&P, and shippers are avoiding the Red Sea.
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Regulators Hated the Figma Deal
Adobe’s Figma acquisition collapsed, Nikola founder Trevor Milton is headed to prison, Washington-area office default risk surpassed San Francisco’s, more Americans own stocks than ever before, the EU is targeting Musk’s X in an illegal content probe, and Binance has to pay the CFTC $2.7B.
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Pudgy Penguins Get Slippery and Bored Apes Gone Wild
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It’s a Mag 7 Market
Wall Street traders are turning to short-dated debt to trade the Fed pivot, the Magnificent Seven are carrying the market, Gazprom set a record high gas flow to China, Citi employees on edge about layoffs can work remote until 2024, Chanos is bullish on US gaming, and Robinhood is wooing wealthier clients from bigger brokerages.
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SAFE No More
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Blackstone’s Cringe Holiday Video
Blackstone dropped an insanely cringe holiday video, markets could continue to rally thanks to money on sidelines, world Central Banks believe victory over inflation is in sight, Yellen outlined plans to improve US-China ties, Argentina still plans to dollarize, and Citi shut down its muni business.
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Roaring 20s Are Back
Powell announced that rate hikes are done, the Dow hit a record high closing above 37,000, Citi is paying partial early bonuses to encourage staff departures, Apple hit a record high, Tesla recalled millions of vehicles, and OpenAI is paying Axel Springer millions to use news content.
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Crypto Crime Cut In Half
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New Penn President
U Penn’s med school dean was named interim president of the university, inflation slowed to 3.1% YoY, EY is laying off partners amid tough economic conditions, Milei devalued the peso by 54%, Citadel is handing back $7B in profits to clients, and OpenAI’s funky corporate structure is skewing its “revenue” results.